Thailand ranked 153rd of 178 countries for press freedom

On Oct 20, Reporters without Borders published its latest world press freedom index. In it, Thailand is ranked 153rd out of 178 countries. We're sandwiched between two former Soviet satellites most Thais have never heard of, Belarus and Azerbaijan. More familiar to us is Cambodia, ranked 128th.

Think about it. In this context, the country under the regime of Premier Hun Sen has more freedom than the nation whose moniker literally translates to ''Land of the Free''.

The UK's Guardian newspaper recently published a story about how Southeast Asian governments - Vietnam, Burma, Cambodia, the Philippines and Thailand - are following in the footsteps of China in the ''authoritarian censorship of the digital world''.

However, those countries rank lower than Thailand on the world press freedom index. But that's like saying a midget is taller than a dwarf. The point is rather moot to everyone apart from the midget and the dwarf. No offence intended to any midget or dwarf.

I will let everybody in on a little secret that is not really a secret. I will not speak for any other Asian country, because it is not my place. But I will speak for Thailand, because it is my right and duty as a citizen.

So prick up your ears and lean a little closer. Ready? Excited? Here goes: ''We don't really want democracy. We only pretend to want it to fool the West.''

Now by ''we'', I of course do not mean all 63.7 million of us. The majority of us unfortunately lack the education to understand, and therefore do not have the knowledge required to decide one way or the other about the ideals of democracy.

For example, the Thai labour force is 37 million strong, and according to the Labour Ministry, 10 million of them have not even completed primary education. The numbers naturally beg to question the word ''strong'' and explain why democracy to most Thais is neither here nor there. We have more immediate worries.

Then there are those idealistic fools like me who stand on a platform and scream ''democracy'', while the real decision makers of the country chuckle and go, ''Yeah, dream on.'' Or if we rock the boat a little too much for comfort, we may end up like Chiranuch Premchiaporn, editor of Prachatai.com, who faces up to 70 years in jail.

Perhaps the political and business elite (after all, the ties between the two are inseparable) are simply masquerading as wanting democracy, but have a not-so-secret desire to build an authoritarian utopia.

For example, look at the ''wonderful'' things China is doing. No need to be a democracy to be rich, power and feared. But we're not China, so we need the word ''democracy''.

And this is why we need to ''fool the West'' _ it's because we want to be a part of the global community, which of course is dominated by Western power and money. To have allies. To trade. To do business. It's what makes the world go round. And they love that word ''democracy'' over there.

But then again, on the flip side, if the Western world is truly sincere about democracy, then no one from the West would be trading with or investing in China. So there you go. A bit puzzling, perhaps?

Burma, North Korea, Cuba and Iran are considered ''rogue states'', supposedly sanctioned for being undemocratic and for their abuse of human rights and freedoms. But China is dhdifferent. What's the difference? Lots of money to be made there. It's what makes the world go round.

Really, Thailand is no more hypocritical than anyone else, are we? In truth, we aren't fooling them, nor are they fooling us. They just have 1st class tickets, while we are 3rd class passengers, but we all travel aboard the same ship of fools.

So let's all pretend. To masquerade as a democracy is easy. All we need to have are elections. So just have them. Lots of countries do.

For many countries of course it's a given that every four or five years you elect an authoritarian ruler, or an oligarch. No need to mind human rights, liberty and civil rights.

Then just make sure to put ''democracy'' under the system of government for your country's entry in Wikipedia _ and no one will be the wiser. You'll be a proud member of the global village.

Human rights abuses? Suppression of freedoms? Bah! There will be columns and reports condemning it, of course. World leaders will make stirring Academy Award-worthy speeches against it, naturally. But at the end of the day, what makes the world go round will continue to make the world go round.

Money doesn't need democracy. Money needs stability.

All that said, my cup is always half full. After all, such is the nature of the idealistic fool. Others may shed tears over the more than 100,000 websites blocked in Thailand. And perhaps many do deserve to be blocked for abusing freedoms rather than exercising them.

But in my half-full cup, I see more than 100,000 websites, even if I strongly disagree with their content, standing up for freedom. And that's more than ever before, isn't it? That is progress. The bans are simply the obstacles. Obstacles to progress are simply the natural order of things. Freedoms aren't served up on a silver platter.

Some may say, ''Voranai, you traitor, you! How can you write so badly about Thailand, saying we are only pretending and masquerading!'' To which I reply: You are very welcome to prove me wrong by putting a stop to the suppression of freedoms.